Do me a favor and add this up: how many people did you communicate with today? If you have partner, kids, family, co-workers, a lot of errand stops…the total was probably high!
If we are in business, we are in the business of developing trusted relationships.
For me, conversations, presentations, and interactions open possibilities and expand my thinking. You have the power to do the same for others.
But how do you activate that power?
You have to be deliberate.
- affects your bottom line
- expands your client and fan base
- establishes you as a trustworthy expert, colleague and/or leader
Being deliberate means you make a conscious choice to bring your attention, focus and goodwill to the conversation or presentation and give it all you got.
Daniel Goleman, well-known for his groundbreaking book, Emotional Intelligence, writes, “For leaders to get results they need all three kinds of focus: inner, other and outer.”
Inner Focus = You
Don’t just grab your notes or handouts on the way out the door. Prepare yourself. Be deliberate. Center, connect and calm yourself with mindful breathing, stretching and vocal release like a long “ahhh..sound.” Come home to your body. Communication is a full embodied experience.
Outer Focus = Intention
Intention can also be a vision or mindset. It’s the big picture–the long view–and this, too needs to be deliberate. What is your desired ultimate outcome with this person or group? Say it aloud. How do you want to show up at this meeting? Do you want to be accessible? Friendly? Approachable? State it. What actions do you want to take…meet 3 people? Listen well? Take charge? Then say it out loud. I get it…may seem like a strange conversation to have with yourself – but saying it and hearing it focuses your mind and future actions.
Other Focus = Audience, Client or Colleague
Now you are centered in your body, aligned with your goals and how you want to be engaged. You’ve created a fertile environment to attune, connect and attend to your audience, client or colleague. Let the connection roll!
“A leader tuned out of his internal world will be rudderless; one blind to the world of others will be clueless; those indifferences to the larger systems will be blindsided.”
Daniel Goleman Focus, The Hidden Driver of Excellence